If you could move the needle on your Enjoyment, WOULD YOU?

“You’re doing the hard work …so why can it feel like NEVER ENOUGH?”

We want to make goals easily achievable

Let’s dive right in…

What is your current View of Self? 

If you were to score your self-worth out of 10, what would your score be right now?

It’s one of the deepest questions I get to ask my clients.  And interestingly, I had this exact conversation with two different people on the same day this week.

Here’s what’s so fascinating about self-worth: It directly influences whether or not you experience joy and meaning in the work you do.

Because let’s face it—if you’re going to do the work anyway, wouldn’t you rather enjoy it than feel resentment, exhaustion, and dissatisfaction? ...so common.

Let’s connect the dots here.

The best definition I’ve come across for worthiness is this:

The unshakable truth that you are enough, simply because you exist—as a whole, complete, one-of-a-kind expression of life.

You don’t have to earn it, prove it, or chase it. It’s already yours.  Simply by EXISTING and EXPRESSING yourself in the many ways that you can. It's a gift that's been given. No strings other than to simply BE you.

The flip side of high self-worth is low self-esteem.  It often shows up as negative self-talk, fear of failure, and a deep fear of rejection or judgment.  And it’s that last one - fear of rejection - that quietly & insidiously derails so much of your performance.

Think about it: if your mind is busy wondering what others will think of your work, you’re not working for fulfillment - you’re hustling for approval!

You start comparing yourself to others, striving for perfection, and convincing yourself that anything less than flawless isn’t good enough.  It makes you withdraw and hide. 

That mindset?  It’s absolutely draining.  I’ve done it.   I do it. 

I have a friend who works incredibly hard—and genuinely enjoys it. He gives 310% to everything he does and expects the same from others. His output and quality is high end.

But here’s the thing…When you’re on his team, or even in his family, and you can’t quite meet his unsustainably high standards, what starts to happen?

It’s not that he means to pressure anyone; it’s just his natural rhythm.  But when praise only shows up for his level of work, others start to believe their work isn’t enough.  And under that kind of leadership, the bar can feel unattainably high.

And here’s the ripple effect:

People begin to equate their value with their output.

If their work doesn’t measure up to a nearly unmatchable standard, they assume they don’t measure up either.  And that belief can quietly erode confidence, initiative, and even passion over time.

If its your kids in an activity or sport they are much more apt to build resentment and quit from lack of enjoyment.   What a waste!   We only ever want our kids to enjoy the experiences, don’t we!?

This is why self-worth isn’t just a personal development topic… it’s a leadership issue.

Whether you are leading a team, family, or yourself, how you relate to your own worth impacts everyone and everything!

When your self-worth is strong, you can work hard without chasing validation.  You work hard and it’s super meaningful to you!   You get fulfillment from it!  

And you can appreciate progress without requiring perfection.  You care less about what others think of your production, and the peace that comes from scrapping the chase for others’ approval is intoxicating!

So what’s the takeaway?

This isn’t about lowering your standards.  It’s about elevating your relationship with enjoyment.   Joy.  And peace.  And flow state – feeling ease.

Instead of asking, “How do I get more done?” ...Try asking, “How can I remind myself to ground in my 10/10 self-worth, so that I can still work hard and, in parallel, experience deep satisfaction and peace?”

Start small.

Celebrate effort, over results.

Be kinder in your self-talk and more frequent in genuine acknowledgement of others. 

Find reasons to acknowledge more of the good things and what goes right.

Give others (and yourself) credit for showing up …especially when it’s hard.

Because when self-worth leads the way, the doing becomes much more fulfilling.  And the results?  They hit another level and bring much more enjoyment and peace.

If you are not sure how to boost your own self-worth, reach out and we’ll have a conversation about this.  It’s too important just to read this and forget it.  

My confidential email: info@coachingwithchris.ca